On the 27th to the 29th of May I went down to Newquay with some friends for my Stag do. I have been visiting Newquay almost every year since I was 7 years old. I know how the place works, and I know what to expect when I visit – or so I thought.

The whole weekend was organised by The Stag Company and included a bar crawl on the Friday night, followed by a Beach BBQ, Surf Lessons a Meal and Nightclub entrance on the Saturday. Fancy dress was allowed with the exception of Mankini’s which we were advised were banned. We stayed at the Kilbernie Hotel at the top end of Newquay (near Lusty Glaze beach). After taking 7 hours to get there on the Friday (damn traffic) we went straight out as we had to meet our organised bar crawl at The Central. We had to walk a fair distance and I was in fancy dress:

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Everyone we walked past loved my outfit, I had photo requests from pensions and brought a smile to people’s faces. Bare in mind that I am the most chilled person ever I was happy to chat to anyone that spoke to us, and were probably one of the best behaved quietest stag do’s in Newquay.

On the way to The Central bar we passed many people, including two Police officers who didn’t stop us, they just smiled nicely. We then bumped into a PCSO (Police Community Support Officer) who came bounding across the high street demanding I take my outfit off. Considering I had nothing other than boxers on underneath I asked if he was joking – given how nice everyone else had been up to now, I thought he may have been being jovial. He wasn’t. Despite not raising my voice and NO-ONE answering back he reached for his pocket asking me if he should write me an ‘order to leave the area’. My response was ‘you know as well as I do you don’t need to do that’. At this point the two Police officers I passed earlier came by and stood near to this PCSO. I made reference to them stating they had not stopped me, and what was their view on it. Mr PCSO (I never got his name or collar number unfortunately) took offence to me referencing the Police and gave the impression he was the sheriff in town, and his decisions applied, no matter what. The reason I had to take my outfit off was due to the fact children might see it. A point I wont argue with, but at almost 9pm on a Friday night we hadn’t seen any. The bar we were heading too was a matter of feet away, but the decision of the PCSO was to walk all the way back the way I came to get changed. Made no sense to me if he was trying to get me off the streets! Be what may a friend accompanied me back to the hotel to get changed. Whilst we were gone the 2 Police officers spoke with my friends I had left behind and stated that they did not feel I deserved to be spoken to the way I was, and advised that they would submit a complaint for us. Bonus! I will be contacting them to follow-up on it as the PCSO had a proper attitude problem. Not someone who should be looking after the streets of Newquay in my opinion.

On the way back to the Hotel we passed another 2 Police officers, again, just a wry smile from them, and then we came across another officer (not sure if Police or PCSO) who was giving the MP for Newquay a tour. Brilliant, time to get lectured again. I told him we had already been spoken to and was on my way to get changed. He said he just wanted to show the MP the type of people they are trying to keep out of Newquay as they don’t want people taking photos and uploading them to social media! Yep, he seriously said that.

The day after we sat on the green where there were several inflatables for kids, and a stag walked past us in full bondage gear. Now that is unacceptable, but the sheriff must have been out-of-town!

I have since sent a tweet to ‘Newquay Sarge‘ and Steve Double (Newquay MP) but neither have replied. I will be contacting them again to follow-up on the complaint the Police said they submitted for us.

I appreciate Stag do’s must be a pain in the ass for Newquay on the whole, but there are ways to speak to people. If a fancy dress outfit is not allowed, ask me nicely and I’ll change. I speak to people and show them respect – I would expect the same in return.

Other than Mr Ego the weekend was great. But if you are stag party, even a mild-mannered sober one, stay away from Newquay – not only will you get busted in fancy dress, but it will no doubt soon be a ghost town. Oh and yes, we did miss the bar crawl.

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