Ever been 3 deep at the bar dying of thirst because someones ordered a round of garden clippings in a glass? Yeah me too.

Wouldn’t it be cool if those of us just wanting a nice quick beer could get one without dying of old age. How about a fast-lane for pints and bottles, bypassing those waiting for their mint to be muddled? Don’t get me wrong I love a good cocktail, throw a Mojito or an Espresso Martini my way any day of the week.

Another option I guess would be to hire more staff to cover the extra labour involved in throwing a cocktail together? For a polite person like me it takes long enough to get served as it is, I ensure that if someone was at the bar before me, but I get served before them, I send the bar tender their way. Others either don’t give a shit and just shout their order out, or actively try and push their way ahead waving 20 quid notes in the air like they are surrendering a battle. I go out to have a good time, but more often than not I find myself dreading finishing my drink because I know I’ve gotta take on the bar crowd again. For me, waiting to be served is like waiting to be picked for a sports team back at school. I was shit at everything so ALWAYS got picked last despite standing my tallest with the biggest smile, and it seems that has carried over into modern day bar etiquette.

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